I recall an old friend of mine describing her childhood this way, My parents allowed me to grow up. When I asked her more, she told me it meant they didn’t interfere with her raising herself. They were there. They provided a roof, food and clothing. They punished regularly. They loved her, she thought, but they were mostly disengaged from the internal workings of her growing up.
I notice the continuation of this trend myself. Many parents seem to be trading the opportunity to engage the minds of their children through curiosity, playfulness, and random chatty childhood rambling, for the unrelenting, task-master role of creating socially appropriate children.
Do this. Do that. Don’t do this. Don’t do that. Stop that. Start this. Ad nauseam for all.
Raise the minds of your children and their bodies will follow right into adulthood.
Ce Eshelman, LMFT