The Imagination Is Worse Than Reality With Traumatized Children

Dear Parents, As a fellow parent, I know what it is like to be scared senseless by TV movies about attachment challenged children, about News reports of foster children killing parents, and my imagination in the face of truly unbelievable, unrelenting shenanigans by my children. Much of my own dysregulation was caused by my ever-present fear of the future hovering…

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Free This Weekend Only: Better Sleep for Anxious Children

Dear Parents, This weekend only Renee Jain, creator of GoZen (which I really enjoy, too), is giving a free gift  to anyone who wants to listen to 18 Sleep Experts share about improving sleep for children who have trouble falling asleep, staying asleep, waking in fear, and/or sleeping with you way past the toddler years. Here is the link.  If your…

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Murphy’s Law: Heaters Bust at the Door to Winter

Dear Parents, Why do heaters stop working the second the temperature outside drops below 50 degrees? Don’t answer that. I am thinking about love. Despite all of my references to love, I am not a particularly touchy-feely person.  I am more of a brutally honest, blunt pragmatist with a huge dose of life experience that led me down a twisty-turny…

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Save Your Words of Wisdom Parents

Dear Parents, Man alive, do we parents talk too much to teenagers–actually to all children.  Why do we do that when we know that even our kindest voice can feel like little pins pricking into their eyeballs? Too graphic? Sorry. Talk less–be slow to fault-find and fast to accept. Back off a bit with parenting and go forward a bit with fun and novelty….

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Fight, Flight, Freeze, Appease, or Lie

Dear Parents, Is your child’s lying a sign of pathology or future doom? Is it disrespectful and an indicator that your child is morally bankrupt?  I know you have thoughts, at least, if not outright accusations leveled toward your child of his/her untrustworthiness.  I sure thought worse and said plenty to my children that I regret before I knew what…

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