Hello: My name is Ce, and I am a big fat electronics enabler. There, I said it. In January I gave my previously traumatized, attachment-challenged son a new computer for his birthday and he cannot manage it. I knew that before I did it, and I did it anyway. Yep, that is the definition of an electronics enabler.
Today, I took it away, plus all the other little devices he has stored up over the years. My son is an electronics addict. I am an electronics enabler. Electronics of all flavors interfere with his ability to function, to be responsible, to take care of himself, to engage with others, to care about people, and to care about his life. How in the world could I do that to him?
Well, I wanted to make him happy, and electronics make him happy in a way nothing else does; but that is just an excuse. He does enjoy other things, when he has no other electronic option. I am the one who caves to his desires. I am his enabler.
Unlike other co-electronics-dependents, I am not powerless over this enabling. I can put my foot down. I put my foot down. Quietly, without fanfare, I destroyed all the electronics in his possession. I have severely disturbed my son. I can live with that. He cannot live unless I disturb his addiction. Done.
My son has retreated to his bedroom, angry with me for my actions. I told him my actions are acts of love. And, they are. They really are. I love that boy and I don’t like him at all when he is practicing his addiction. Enabling him makes no sense. I am a sensible person. I am now in recovery.
The next 8 hr. Trust Based Parent Training is scheduled for April 23rd and 30th from 12noon to 4pm. $200 per couple. Childcare available for $30 each day, second child $10 additional. To sign up email Jen@attachplace.com and she will register you.
Drowning With My Hair On Fire