Author Archive for Ce Eshelman

How They Feel On The Inside

Dear Parents,

A 15-year-old girl sits in my office managing to look caved in while sitting straight up.  She says a familiar refrain, “My parents don’t understand me.”

What are they not understanding honey? 

“Me. They don’t see me.  They see who they think I am.”

Who are you that they are not seeing?

“Well, they all look alike, even my sister and brother who are adopted too look just like my parents—blonde with blue eyes.  I don’t look like I belong.  I’m Indian.  I like Indian things.  Food, my culture, but it isn’t their culture and they think it isn’t my culture because they got me as a baby and their culture should be mine.  It isn’t.  I’m Indian.  Look at me.  I’m brown.  My friends see it, but not my parents.”

Have you told them?

“Yes, I used to all the time, but they laugh at me and tell me I’m making up things to be miserable about. I don’t know.  I feel miserable, but I know I’m spoiled and I have a good life.”

The Attach Place

The Attach Place
Center for Strengthening Relationships

This is where the rubber hits the road.  Kids who have a great life can feel like they don’t fit into it because of how they feel inside.  That internal feeling can motivate a child to unconsciously work hard to create an external reality that matches how they feel—anger, frustration, depression, shenanigans, opposition, malaise, low motivation, lack of gratitude, and basic disagreeableness.  Before long, the happy family life with all the great trimmings becomes chaotic and negative, or worse. You might be living with a miserable tyrant, diva, bully.

If this is happening in your home, slow it way down.  Your child is acting out of how s/he feels inside. Take the time to listen (a lot and often) to the heart of your child, even when you think your child should be happy and grateful for your fabulous family life.  If children don’t feel the fabulous on the inside, there will be little ability to respect and appreciate it on the outside.

Love matters,

Ce

NEW THERAPEUTIC PARENTING WEBINAR: 6-Week Interactive Therapeutic Parenting Webinar, August 1 through September 7, 2017.  IN PROGRESS NOW.

UPCOMING THERAPEUTIC PARENTING CLASS: Sign up here for the next day long Therapeutic Parenting Class on September 9, 2017 from 9 am to 4 pm at The Attach Place, Sacramento, CA.

UPCOMING ADOPTION SUPPORT GROUP:  Join our monthly Adoptive/Foster Parent Support Group on August 9th, 2017! Open to all parents/caregivers at no cost. Support Group is every 2nd Wednesday of every month from 6 pm to 8 pm at 3336 Bradshaw Road, Ste 175, Sacramento, CA 95827. Free child care provided.

TRY MY BOOK FOR SUPPORT: Drowning With My Hair On Fire: Insanity Relief For Adoptive Parents by Ce Eshelman, LMFT.  Daily inspirational reading for those who sometimes find it hard to keep hope alive. There is hope for healing.

FOLLOW US:  Twitter @lovingradkids and @Attachmenthelp or Facebook.

Attention Is Not The Only Reason For Negative Behavior

Dear Parents:

When I was a kid, I loved watching private eye shows on TV, not because I particularly wanted to sit around watching people through binoculars all day but more because I am keenly interested in human nature.  Also, TV P.I.’s often had cool cars. I settled and became a therapist instead.

When I was a kid, I loved watching private eye shows on TV, not because I particularly wanted to sit around watching people through binoculars all day but more because I am keenly interested in human nature.  Also, TV P.I.’s often had cool cars. I settled and became a therapist instead.  Same job really, but my preferred car turns out to be a station-wagon–no kidding.

Being a parent of children who are difficult to understand requires a similar skill set. Before you can intervene in a problem behavior you have to understand the meaning of it.  That requires investigation.

The best way to start is to ask the question:  Why does s/he do that?

Once you know the motivation, it will be easier to design a successful intervention–which means “meet their need.” When answering the question, take into consideration some of the following ideas:

  • Dysregulation due to something in the environment.
  • Dysregulation due to something inside the body.
  • Dysregulation due to something imagined.
  • Dysregulation due to the past.
  • Dysregulation due to boredom.
  • Dysregulation due to overstimulation.
  • Dysregulation due to an anniversary.
  • Dysregulation due to anticipation anxiety.
  • Dysregulation due to change, transition, the beginning of a new school year.
  • Dysregulation due to your dysregulation.
  • To habitually control or manage fear/anxiety dysregulation.
  • For love and connection.
  • To feel powerful instead of powerless.
  • To be mean and cruel for no reason (Tip: This is not a real motivation.  Look deeper.)
  • The opposite of whatever the child answers because our children do appreciate the rock lifted off and their motives discovered.
  • Throw in some outlandish reason only a kid would think makes sense.
The Attach Place

The Attach Place
Center for Strengthening Relationships

Make a couple of studied guesses. Prioritize the motivations that you think are the most likely and attempt to meet the need on the top of the list.  If the problem behavior doesn’t change once you address what you think is the correct motivation, move down your list.  You may have it wrong or there is more need there than meets the eye.  Keep going.  Eventually, you will begin to understand your child the way a detective understands the subject.

Hint: children rarely know why they do what they do and they are highly susceptible to what you tell them.  Be careful what you tell them about themselves because over time that is what they will think about themselves.

Attention is not the only reason for behavior.

Love matters,

Ce

NEW THERAPEUTIC PARENTING WEBINAR: 6-Week Interactive Therapeutic Parenting Webinar, August 1 through September 7, 2017.  IN PROGRESS NOW.

UPCOMING THERAPEUTIC PARENTING CLASS: Sign up here for the next day long Therapeutic Parenting Class on September 9, 2017 from 9 am to 4 pm at The Attach Place, Sacramento, CA.

UPCOMING GROUP:  Join our monthly Adoptive/Foster Parent Support Group on August 9th, 2017! Open to all parents/caregivers at no cost. Support Group is every 2nd Wednesday of every month from 6 pm to 8 pm at 3336 Bradshaw Road, Ste 175, Sacramento, CA 95827. Free child care provided.

TRY MY BOOK FOR SUPPORT: Drowning With My Hair On Fire: Insanity Relief For Adoptive Parents by Ce Eshelman, LMFT.  Daily inspirational reading for those who sometimes find it hard to keep hope alive. There is hope for healing.

 

FOLLOW US:  Twitter @lovingradkids and @Attachmenthelp or Facebook.

Insecurity Needs Your Secure Connection

Dear Parents,

It’s a fact.  Our children from difficult beginnings have a bucket of need they carry around with them in their hearts.  It may seem like a bottomless bucket, and your own bucket is getting on the empty side trying to fill it up.  When it feels like that, take heed.  You need to get your own bucket filled up somewhere else, so you can feel rejuvenated to do what you need to do another day.

Regulation Is The Key

What do you do to fill up your bucket?  Come on, slow down a second and really answer the question for yourself.  Make a list.  What rejuvenates you?  What pleases you?  What gives you rest?  Peace?  Solace? Soothing?  Regulation?

If you don’t know this list, backward and forward, you are not paying enough attention to your own needs.  You can only go so long with an empty bucket before you resent, resist, and refuse to fill the bucket of your child.

Couples Blog

The Attach Place
Center for Strengthening Relationships

You Have To Do Something For Things to Be Different

Come on, write down your list.  Once you have it written, share it with your partner or a friend so that person can help you do something for yourself every day.  Oh yes, I did say every day.  You need to be doing something for yourself every day in order to de-stress and stay in regulation mode with your kids.

That’s it for the most meaningful advice I can give you about healing the hearts of children from difficult beginnings.  Parents matter, and in order to have the level of self-regulation you need to be a regulating force in your child’s life you must take action every day.  Just do it.

Love matters,

Ce

NEW THERAPEUTIC PARENTING WEBINAR: 6-Week Interactive Therapeutic Parenting Webinar, August 1 through September 7, 2017.  Register here.

UPCOMING GROUP:  Join our monthly Adoptive/Foster Parent Support Group on August 9th, 2017! Open to all parents/caregivers at no cost. Support Group is every 2nd Wednesday of every month from 6 pm to 8 pm at 3336 Bradshaw Road, Ste 175, Sacramento, CA 95827. Free child care provided.

TRY MY BOOK FOR SUPPORT: Drowning With My Hair On Fire: Insanity Relief For Adoptive Parents by Ce Eshelman, LMFT.  Daily inspirational reading for those who sometimes find it hard to keep hope alive. There is hope for healing.

 

FOLLOW US:  Twitter @lovingradkids and @Attachmenthelp or Facebook.

When I First Adopted, I Wish…

Dear Parents,

I read an article today from Adoptive Families that stimulated my own thinking.  I am pretty sure this is summed up in my book, but here is the short version.

When I first adopted my children, I wish…

…I knew that therapeutic parenting was a thing and that I had read two books in particular:  The Connected Child by Karyn Purvis and David Cross and Beyond Consequences by Heather Forbes.

…On day one, I had put into practice everything I read in the two books noted above.

…I had done my own trauma work before adoption so that I had a start on healing wounds from my childhood, a jump on understanding the nature of dysregulation, and a huge toolbox full of self- and other-regulation remedies.

Couples Blog

The Attach Place
Center for Strengthening Relationships

…I had deeply understood that parenting a child from difficult beginnings was about attending to the deep loss, pain, and needs of the child.  I thought parenting was about getting to love and be loved by a child.  That was a child-like and naive notion.  I really had no idea.

…I had put into place a large support circle to help my family through the tough times and to celebrate the breakthroughs and good times.

…I had been firm about the right things–respect, kindness, regulation–and forgiving about everything else–broken rules, broken promises, broken vases.

If you are at the beginning of your adoption journey, take heart and a little advice. If you are in the middle, it is never too late to start.

Love matters,

Ce

NEW THERAPEUTIC PARENTING WEBINAR: 6-Week Interactive Therapeutic Parenting Webinar, August 1 through September 7, 2017.  Register here.

UPCOMING GROUP:  Join our monthly Adoptive/Foster Parent Support Group on July 12th, 2017! Open to all parents/caregivers at no cost. Support Group is every 2nd Wednesday of every month from 6 pm to 8 pm at 3336 Bradshaw Road, Ste 175, Sacramento, CA 95827. Free child care provided.

TRY MY BOOK: Drowning With My Hair On Fire: Insanity Relief For Adoptive Parents by Ce Eshelman, LMFT.  Daily inspirational reading for those who sometimes find it hard to keep hope alive. There is hope for healing.

 

FOLLOW US:  Twitter @lovingradkids and @Attachmenthelp or Facebook.

Cortisol Overload

Hello Parents,

I’ve just crawled out from under my bed with my dogs after a night of barking shenanigans.  Hope you had a fun day yesterday with few emotional meltdowns.

Couples Blog

The Attach Place
Center for Strengthening Relationships

Remember, fun can create the same neuro-cascade of adrenalin and cortisol as can scary or negative experiences.  To that end, on the day after bright lights and big excitement, it makes sense to tread lightly to allow for fatigue and repair from adrenal overload.  Eat lots of fresh foods, encourage hydration, and allow for active crash and bump activities every couple of hours.  Keep video games to zero when possible.

That’s a pretty good recipe for keeping lids on during the summer months.  Have fun, and then repair!

Love matters,

Ce

NEW WEBINAR: 6-Week Interactive Therapeutic Parenting Webinar, August 1 through September 7, 2017.  Register here.

UPCOMING GROUP:  Join our monthly Adoptive/Foster Parent Support Group on July 12th, 2017! Open to all parents/caregivers at no cost. Support Group is every 2nd Wednesday of every month from 6 pm to 8 pm at 3336 Bradshaw Road, Ste 175, Sacramento, CA 95827. Free child care provided.

TRY MY BOOK: Drowning With My Hair On Fire: Insanity Relief For Adoptive Parents by Ce Eshelman, LMFT.  Daily inspirational reading for those who sometimes find it hard to keep hope alive. There is hope for healing.

 

FOLLOW US:  Twitter @lovingradkids and @Attachmenthelp or Facebook.

Nowhere But Up From Here

Dear Parents,
I wrote some of this in response to another parent whom I love dearly but could not really help in the end.  This morning on my walk (yes, I do walk 5 miles a day these days) I was thinking about her and me and you.

Every Parent’s Struggle

I believe your struggle is my struggle, is every parent’s struggle.  Our children’s traumatized brains make the struggle visceral and often so concrete it is hard to breathe, as though concrete is sitting on our chests or we have swallowed a brick or two whole into our guts.  As ironic as this language is going to sound, my personal goal is to learn to let go of that heavy, toxic attachment to the outcomes that I feel heavy inside my heart and body.
I want to experience the lightness of love in every cell which, for me, entails knowing that I am not in charge of the universe or my children. When I get quiet enough, I can.  My young adult daughter accuses me of not accepting her as she is in the vitriol only a wounded, angry child can.  She is right about that. I am hooked, stuck even, on her living closer to my values.  That is something I don’t require from any other person in order for me to give acceptance and love.  But for her, I am constantly pushing her to make better choices and wiser decisions.  Of course, I think that will lead her to a more fulfilling life which is what I want for her.  She, on the other hand, feels only the pressure of expectation and the weight of her own shame in the face of my inevitable disappointment when she doesn’t live up. The feelings devastate her and she is wounded over and over and over.

Acceptance Is Love

I am learning to accept “what is” and to stay loving. I am also learning to accept and love without conflating those with an obligation to help; because helping my children without an attachment to the outcome is proving to be a problem for me.   I feel kind of “addicted” to trying to help them, too.  Loving and helping are not the same.  I am just now really teasing these two things apart, and I have to in order to get myself further down the parenting road.
Couples Blog

The Attach Place
Center for Strengthening Relationships

Like love, help is either conditional or unconditional.  I personally need only help in the way I would give a gift–unconditionally.   If I give a birthday gift to someone, I am never concerned over what they do with it–that is the nature of gifts, right?  What my children do with my gifts is really none of my business.

Today, I am working to give only those things that I can without an attachment to the outcome–that includes my time, energy, efforts, influence, money, cars, housing–even acceptance, and love.  That is my current daily life meditation.  It is getting easier with practice, but letting go turns out to be as painful as walking barefoot across a landscape of nails just the same.
Love matters,
Ce

 

NEW WEBINAR: 6-Week Interactive Therapeutic Parenting Webinar, August 1 through September 7, 2017.  Register here.

NEXT CLASS:  Therapeutic Parenting Class for Foster and Adoptive Parents is scheduled for June 24th, 2017 from 9 am to 4 pm.  Register here.

UPCOMING GROUP:  Join our monthly Adoptive/Foster Parent Support Group on June 14th, 2017! Open to all parents/caregivers at no cost. Support Group is every 2nd Wednesday of every month from 6 pm to 8 pm at 3336 Bradshaw Road, Ste 175, Sacramento, CA 95827. Free child care provided.

READ MY BOOK: Drowning With My Hair On Fire: Insanity Relief For Adoptive Parents by Ce Eshelman, LMFT.  Daily inspirational reading for those who sometimes find it hard to keep hope alive. There is hope for healing.

 

FOLLOW US:  Twitter @lovingradkids and @Attachmenthelp or Facebook.

Day After Daddy’s Day Hangover

Dear Parents,

Couples Blog

The Attach Place
Center for Strengthening Relationships

I hope you are doing well after the kid overdose on Father’s Day.  Dads, I hope you got good and celebrated and you are spending today nursing your kid hangover.  What will you do for yourself today?  That is always the question.  If you aren’t taking care of yourself at least half as much as you are caring for your children, you are going to burn right out and unlike dead light bulbs, you cannot get a new you from the box in the hall closet. Put yourself on the Honey Do List.  Your “honey” wants that for you, too.

Love matters,

Ce

NEW WEBINAR: 6-Week Interactive Therapeutic Parenting Webinar, August 1 through September 7, 2017.  Register here.

NEXT CLASS:  Therapeutic Parenting Class for Foster and Adoptive Parents is scheduled for June 24th, 2017 from 9 am to 4 pm.  Register here.

UPCOMING GROUP:  Join our monthly Adoptive/Foster Parent Support Group on June 14th, 2017! Open to all parents/caregivers at no cost. Support Group is every 2nd Wednesday of every month from 6 pm to 8 pm at 3336 Bradshaw Road, Ste 175, Sacramento, CA 95827. Free child care provided.

PURCHASE MY BOOK: Drowning With My Hair On Fire: Insanity Relief For Adoptive Parents by Ce Eshelman, LMFT.  Daily inspirational reading for those who sometimes find it hard to keep hope alive. There is hope for healing.

 FOLLOW US:  Twitter @lovingradkids and @Attachmenthelp or Facebook.

Register Today: Webinar to Support Adoptive Parents

Dear Parents:

Reminder, if you are thinking about signing up for the upcoming webinar, get registered while the price is right.  The early registration fee for the 6-week course is $149.00. After July 1, 2017, the fee will be $199.00.  The beauty of a webinar is that you can attend from anywhere: home in your jammies, while on vacation, at Starbucks, even in the gym.

6-week Interactive Therapeutic Parenting Webinar 

Couples Blog

The Attach Place
Center for Strengthening Relationships

This 6-week webinar is designed for busy parents (as if there are any other kinds) who cannot make it to a brick and mortar, Sacramento, CA based training, and who need effective information and knowledgeable support for weathering the turbulent waters of raising children from difficult beginnings of attachment breach, neglect, and other abuse traumas.

Who Would Benefit From Attending this Webinar

Parents, grandparents, teachers, and caregivers of traumatized children, adoptive children, foster children, and kinship placed children.  Even if you have had therapeutic parenting education before, you can never have enough support on your journey raising children who do not respond positively to traditional parenting the way you are expecting.

How It Works

Each instructional webinar is one hour long with an option to spend an extra 15-minutes in a live Q & A. The instructional webinar will be held Tuesdays from 10 am to 11:15 am.  On Thursdays of the same week, there will be a one-hour facilitated discussion support webinar to for all participants to talk freely about the content of the prior webinar and application to your own personal family lives.

Weekly Webinar Content Breakdown

  1. Tuesday, 8/1/17,  10 am to 11:15 am: The Brain’s the Thing: The Developing Brain on Trauma

Thursday, 8/3/17, 10 am to 11 am: Facilitated Discussion Support Group

  1. Tuesday, 8/8/17, 10 am to 11:15 am: Regulation Is Key: Difficult Beginnings and Regulation Tools

Thursday, 8/10/17, 10 am to 11 am: Facilitated Discussion Support Group

  1. Tuesday, 8/15/17, 10 am to 11:15 am: Your Parental Attachment Suitcase: All About You

Thursday, 8/17/17 10 am to 11:00 am: Facilitated Discussion Support Group

  1. Tuesday, 8/22/17, 10 am to 11:15 am: Trust-Based Parenting: Building Your Environment

Thursday, 8/24/17 10 am to 11 am: Facilitated Discussion Support Group

  1. Tuesday, 8/29/17, 10 am to 11:15 am: Trust-Based Parenting: Strengthening Your Connection

Thursday, 8/31/17, 10 am to 11 am: Facilitated Discussion Support Group

  1. Tuesday, 9/5/17, 10 am to 11:15 am: Trust Based Parenting: Using Correction Correctly

Thursday, 9/7/17, 10 am to 11 am: Facilitated Closure Support Group

What Will This Cost?

The early registration fee for the 6-week course is $149.00.  After July 1, 2017, the fee will be $199.00. Downloadable materials will be available for each class and recordings will be made available for participants who cannot make the actual date and time of the webinar.  At this time, the Q. and A. portion of each webinar will not be recorded, nor will the content of the support groups be recorded.  If you want to gather your friends and/or family members together in one room for each webinar, you are welcome to do so at no extra charge.  It helps when everyone in the family is on the same page and when your friends are using the same strategies you are. The more the merrier.

If you are ready to reserve your webinar spot, register here.

Love matters,

Ce

NEXT CLASS:  Therapeutic Parenting Class for Foster and Adoptive Parents is scheduled for June 24th, 2017 from 9 am to 4 pm.  Register here.

NEXT GROUP:  Join our monthly Adoptive/Foster Parent Support Group on June 14th, 2017! Open to all parents/caregivers at no cost. Support Group is every 2nd Wednesday of every month from 6 pm to 8 pm at 3336 Bradshaw Road, Ste 175, Sacramento, CA 95827. Free child care provided.

Get your specially discounted copy of Drowning With My Hair On Fire: Insanity Relief For Adoptive Parents by Ce Eshelman, LMFT.  Daily inspirational reading for those who sometimes find it hard to keep hope alive. There is hope for healing.

Follow us on Twitter @lovingradkids and @Attachmenthelp or Facebook.

Cyber Safety: Oxymoronic

Dear Parents:

Cyber security seems downright oxymoronic to me.  Is there such a thing these days?  Well probably not, but cyber is a fact of life, so we all better get hip if we are going to stay up on the cyber wave our children are surfing.  Children are targeted 35 times more often than adults for identity theft alone. Kids, especially emotionally vulnerable children and teens who have weak attachment glue and trauma brains, are particularly susceptible to cyber shenanigans, conflict, bullying, and victimization. Don’t wait to get informed and don’t wait to put safety parameters around your children’s cyber access to a social life that is way off the grid and outside the boundaries of healthy living.

One Can Never Unsee Some Things

I am suddenly recalling the memory of a close-up shot of an erect penis showing up on my cell phone about fifteen minutes after one of my children asked to borrow it for a quick text to a friend.  Oh no, there that image is again.  Can’t unsee it.  My child was 12 at the time.  Start way earlier to stem the tide, but it is never too late to put the brakes on total cyber freedom.

Test Your Text Chops

Do you know what half of these things mean?  If you are lucky, your children fail the test, too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

June is Cyber Safety Month, by the way.  Look what a great resource I found at BARK.

Finally, here are two cyber safety links: 1) for parents and 2) for teachers.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Love matters,

Ce

NEW WEBINAR: 6-Week Interactive Therapeutic Parenting Webinar, August 1 through September 7, 2017.  Register here.

NEXT CLASS:  Therapeutic Parenting Class for Foster and Adoptive Parents is scheduled for June 24th, 2017 from 9 am to 4 pm.  Register here.

UPCOMING GROUP:  Join our monthly Adoptive/Foster Parent Support Group on June 14th, 2017! Open to all parents/caregivers at no cost. Support Group is every 2nd Wednesday of every month from 6 pm to 8 pm at 3336 Bradshaw Road, Ste 175, Sacramento, CA 95827. Free child care provided.

PURCHASE MY BOOK: Drowning With My Hair On Fire: Insanity Relief For Adoptive Parents by Ce Eshelman, LMFT.  Daily inspirational reading for those who sometimes find it hard to keep hope alive. There is hope for healing.

 FOLLOW US:  Twitter @lovingradkids and @Attachmenthelp or Facebook.

Unlikely Torch Runner

Dear Parents,

Many of you look to me for hope and inspiration along your child-rearing journey, and I am such an unlikely repository.  Still, I try to carry the light.  Can you see? I am standing on my tippee toes holding the torch above my head.  I’m holding it high though many times I am standing far below in the shadows. The light can hardly touch me in my own journey.

Projective Identification Is A Thing

The last couple weeks I have been bumbling along the dimly lit path of raising my own adult children from difficult beginnings.  Once again, my attempts to help my grown children are being perceived by them as applying unbearable pressure; pressure to be something they are not; pressure to live the way I live. Sometimes I feel side-swiped by projective identification where I am seen as the bad mother who took them against their will, and they experience themselves as unwitting victims of my unreasonable expectations.

Adult Children From Difficult Beginnings

I have struggled with this for the last 3 years in particular, as my children have become adults.  My wanting them to finish school; my wanting them to seek work; my wanting them to live in a home; my wanting them to drive safe cars; my wanting them to speak the truth; my wanting them to use my resources to help themselves into independence; all my wanting for them is experienced as stressful and strangely unachievable–the bar is too high.  My daughter in anger says, “The more I accept help from you and try to shape my life under your rules the more f***ed my life comes and I will never forgive you….”  These words stab at my heart more than any knife she might have wielded.  Her way of thinking about me makes my head spin around on my neck.  Is she talking about me?  Good old codependent mommy, me?   And, yes, she surely is.

Couples Blog

The Attach Place
Center for Strengthening Relationships

I tell myself what I often tell you: our children have their own trajectories.  No matter how much I try to help, they have their own trajectories.  I cannot help them because they want to do it their own way. That way is, in my wizened opinion, the hard way.  My children demand they take the hard way no matter how easy I think it could be with my help.  Life is just not easy for them.  Try as I might, I simply cannot make it otherwise.

Repeat After Me:  They Have Trajectories of Their Own

All that is left for me is to accept their decisions.  I do not get to help.  They require getting the life they want on their own. This is my lesson to learn.  They have trajectories of their own.  I am scared for them and they have trajectories of their own.  Have I repeated that enough so that my own ears can hear? Probably not.

Stay strong, my dear friends, for sometimes the night is long and the horizon seems forever in the distance. Your safety, love, and security are all you really have to offer.  Your children have to find their own ways with and sometimes without your help.

Love matters,

Ce

NEW WEBINAR: 6-Week Interactive Therapeutic Parenting Webinar, August 1 through September 7, 2017.  Register here.

NEXT CLASS:  Therapeutic Parenting Class for Foster and Adoptive Parents is scheduled for June 24th, 2017 from 9 am to 4 pm.  Register here.

UPCOMING GROUP:  Join our monthly Adoptive/Foster Parent Support Group on June 14th, 2017! Open to all parents/caregivers at no cost. Support Group is every 2nd Wednesday of every month from 6 pm to 8 pm at 3336 Bradshaw Road, Ste 175, Sacramento, CA 95827. Free child care provided.

PURCHASE MY BOOK: Drowning With My Hair On Fire: Insanity Relief For Adoptive Parents by Ce Eshelman, LMFT.  Daily inspirational reading for those who sometimes find it hard to keep hope alive. There is hope for healing.

 FOLLOW US:  Twitter @lovingradkids and @Attachmenthelp or Facebook.