Our children have a story they tell themselves. Do you know what your child’s internal story is? You might hear it leaking out in times of emotional upheaval: Nobody likes me. I never get what I want. It’s too hard. I can’t. You don’t love me. I don’t love anybody. I hate myself. I hate everyone. I can do it without anyone’s help. I don’t need you. I don’t need love. I hate love.
Having a coherent narrative is one of the keys to mental health. Whenever you can, tell your child the story you want them to tell themselves inside. YOU don’t need to make anything up. Your child is precious, loved, planned, wanted, adored, valued, appreciated, and special. Make sure you say these things all the time–10,000 times to make a new neuro-pathway.
Ce Eshelman, LMFT